| I have reason to believe my penis was exposed to LSD. When I ejaculate I have flashbacks. |
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My hair is falling out and the sun hurts my crotch. |
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I went to a party, had a few beers, woke up in a closet later on and my face stunk and my dick hurt. |
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I think my boyfriend knows what's going on. He's been calling me a 'chlamydiahoris.'
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Customers see me itching down there and they don't ask me for lap dances
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| My last period looked like meat. |
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My balls feel soft and mushy. |
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My pee smells like ham. |
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I have food chunks in my urine.
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Had sex with my daughter's fiancé and then douched with Lysol--feelin' a little raw down there.
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| I have open scabs on my butt and I'm losing my mind. |
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I'm releasing semen when I take a crap. |
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I was poked in the rectum with the infected finger of a 70-year-old homosexual man. |
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I live at the VA and my roommate has his girlfriend from Minneapolis over. They throw ticks at me that bite my neck and when I pop the sores, they smell like vagina juice.
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I had sex with my baby's momma, sex with my other baby's momma and my other new baby's momma has disease.
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| Can't you put the swab in further and wiggle it around? |
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Last time I had sex I passed something that looked like Cream of Wheat before it's cooked. |
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My cervix hurts when I jiggle. |
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The seam in my circumcision split open.
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My whole body smells like a menstruating skunk, especially my armpits.
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| I be messin' with my ex-wife and my girlfriend and I don't trust either of them. |
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From the looks of my penis, I believe they are sucking the adrenaline out of me. |
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I think they hypnotized me and put implants and poltergeists in my brain and had sex with me. |
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I be messin' with these nasty women from Minnesota and they don't tell you they got something unless they mad at you.
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How am I supposed to do lap dances smelling like a dead fish?
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I got the dripper.
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